In A Society That Seeks Security

Well tonight is my third night looking at this computer and trying to put together my thoughts so I can share with you. As I have always been one to journal, I never had to be extremely vulnerable and real with others through writing, except in my JESUS JOURNAL. So here I go friends…

For as long as I can remember I have always been a planner. I was that naïve high school girl who had the next five years of her life planned out. I was set on being engaged and planning my wedding my senior year of college. I planned to take a gap year in between my undergraduate studies and graduate studies to gain experience, then of course be married and eventually have kids. I would live in my small town of Angola Indiana to raise a family. Now as we all know, that is not how it has played out whatsoever.

My sophomore year of my undergrad God was calling me to a different college. My senior year of college I took a leap of faith and participated in a DC semester where I would live with 17 other college students (Never thought I would do that). My next plan was to complete my internship in Washington DC, return to Grand Rapids and start my career. In fact, I had already signed a lease in Grand Rapids and bought that gym membership because I knew I could not use my Alma mater’s facilities anymore.

By April of 2016 I had fallen in love with Washington DC and wanted to stay. On a Wednesday night as I went to bed I prayed to God that if in fact I was supposed to move to the capital, to show me a sign. The next day I had a meeting with my Executive Director and she explained that nothing was set in stone but if a contract came through the job was mine. I called my father sobbing due to Gods faithfulness. The last day of my internship I was offered a job and asked to be out here a week later. Now for those who also like to plan everything out you could imagine how stressful it seemed. Not only did I have to pack up my entire life in one week to move 8 hours from my family but also spend time with all my friends and family that I had not seen in three months in addition to starting my career before graduation had even taken place.

At this time I understood that cliché quote that “God’s plan is bigger than our own.” I full heartedly believed that but this was the first time I was truly experiencing it. I began learning a lot about letting things play out in my life. People would ask how long are you going to be in DC and I did not have an answer for them. It was so prevalent at this time that planning out my life was not all that necessary, because Gods best trumps our best.
Long term plans were for God to decide but I still felt like I could plan out my week by week. As I began my career I had three calendars with all my events in both my professional and personal life. I would check it every Sunday to prepare for my week and continue this trend. My planning gets to the point where sometimes I have my outfits planned out for the week (I know a little excessive).

Towards the end of the summer I began thinking about next steps… again planning out my life. I mentioned to a friend that I was interested in The World Race but days later I changed my mind after finding excuses of why I could not go. As I continuously said NO to God he consistently SHOWED UP. Some might find this ironic because usually when one disobeys God he takes away but he was constantly being faithful to me through major blessings and different devotions. So as I planned to go to grad school in September 2017, His plan for me was missions in August 2017.

As I continued the application process and interviewing I would doubt that this was the plan. I would continue to make other plans and disobey God. Again God was tugging on my heart. I do not want you to get the wrong impression, I am beyond excited about The World Race but as someone who likes a plan, the doubts are flowing through my mind. What if I don’t raise the money? How am I going to get all this gear? I won’t be in the states for 11 whole months… I am sure you can imagine all the other unnecessary thoughts.

Two weeks ago I shared with everyone that I would be going on The World Race. Since this time God has continuously showed me that He has it. I have been questioned about my employment, dating, leaving friends and family. Of course, this has all crossed my mind but if there is one thing I have learned it is that the society we live in, seeks security. We want that amazing job, starting a 401k at the age of 21, buying a house, settling down and making that five year plan. Do not get me wrong in the fact that one day I absolutely would love all these things but God has simply said “Not right now Brit.” I am learning all about God’s YES and living with abandon. A verse that has come dear to my heart is Luke 6:46. It says “Why do you call me, Lord, Lord, and do not do what I say?” If you are unaware, Lord in Hebrew is Adonai which is defined as a master. The Lord is our master and I yearn to better serve him by planning LESS and trusting MORE.